I think we all have our weak areas of life where our faith is tested. There are many areas of life where my faith has passed the test, and even now when I go through those trials my faith remains. But it seems like the Lord allows certain areas of our life where our faith is continually tested...for me it's my family. When a family member is sick, in pain, and there is almost nothing you can do, I tend to panic. I pray with panic, rather than with faith. I become anxious, and many times impatient with regards to their healing or recovery. This is one of my down areas of life.
And, as always, the Lord works and brings healing and recovery. And not without my feeling ashamed of how I panicked and became impatient. I eventually ask for forgiveness, and ask God to teach me, strengthen my faith, to prepare me for when it may happen again, that my faith may be strengthened again and again.
During my recent struggle with faith I came to the Lord, ashamed as always for my lack of faith, and came to Him with a humbled heart, and asked "Lord, is there anyone in the Bible who was like me, whose faith wavered even just for a while". And in my heart I "heard" an answer from God...it was like a divine whisper. And His answer was "My Son". God's Son, my Savior and Lord, was that someone in the Bible whose faith wavered!
And immediately I remembered the event in the garden of Gethsemane:
Matthew 26:36-39 Then Jesus went with his disciples to a place called Gethsemane, and he said to them, "Sit here while I go over there and pray." (37) He took Peter and the two sons of Zebedee along with him, and he began to be sorrowful and troubled. (38) Then he said to them, "My soul is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death. Stay here and keep watch with me." (39) Going a little farther, he fell with his face to the ground and prayed, "My Father, if it is possible, may this cup be taken from me. Yet not as I will, but as you will."
During these last moments of His life, our Savior was overwhelmed with sorrow, and actually asked the Father if it was possible not to let His crucifixion continue. But the whole time ends with our Savior saying "Yet not as I will, but as you will". There was submission.
I have my Savior and Lord, my God now seated at the right hand of the Father, who went through exactly what I go through. If there is anyone who understands, who can identify with us, it is Jesus Himself! In His humanity he was overwhelmed and actually asked God to take away the circumstance He was about to face. But His faith prevailed, and submitted to the sovereign will of His Father.
This is why we can call upon Him, and He will surely comfort us and restore us, because He Himself went through it, and was restored.
Hebrews 2:17-18 For this reason he had to be made like his brothers in every way, in order that he might become a merciful and faithful high priest in service to God, and that he might make atonement for the sins of the people. (18) Because he himself suffered when he was tempted, he is able to help those who are being tempted.
Hebrews 4:15-16 For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are--yet was without sin. (16) Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.
This is why eventually, even with bouts of "faith swings", we will eventually pass the test and our faith will be strengthened, because we have a God who sympathizes with us, and will strengthen us and see us through.
This was the Lord's promise to Simon:
Luke 22:31-32 Simon, Simon, Satan has asked to sift you as wheat. (32) But I have prayed for you, Simon, that your faith may not fail. And when you have turned back, strengthen your brothers."
It is our Lord Himself who will make sure that our faith will not fail. All we have to do is to call upon Him, no matter how down or weak our faith may be.
