Living a Good Eulogy

I officiated in a burial service today for the father of a church member who passed away just last December 31.  We sang a few songs, shared God’s Word, and then listened to friends, loved ones, and family members share their eulogies concerning the deceased.  Officemates, a neighbor, a “kumpare”, a niece and his daughter stood up one by one and started sharing about what a great officemate, friend, uncle, husband and father he was.  And though they were sad that he had gone ahead, and that they would not see him anymore, yet they were joyful that now he was with His Creator, in a “better place”, eternally enjoying the presence of His God.

While listening to the eulogies, it got me thinking – “I wonder what people will say when I’m gone”.  I don’t want to sound morbid, or inconsiderate, but that’s what I was thinking…what would my fellow pastors, church members, Christian friends, family members, and my immediate family say?  As imperfect as I am I did hope, in my imagination, that my friends and family would remember the good things in me. 

And it made me think – I better make sure that I live in a way that people will see the good things in me!  What I want people to say about me when I’m dead will all depend on how I have lived with each of them.  I pray that as I walk by God’s grace everyday, allowing Him to change me and mold my character, other people will be recipients of good eulogies for me in the future!  Better than that, I do pray that people will see that it was not me, but God, who molded and formed the Christ-like character that He took hold of me for.

Makes for a good new years’ resolution, doesn’t it?

Proverbs 22:1  A good name is more desirable than great riches; to be esteemed is better than silver or gold.

Ecclesiastes 7:1  A good name is better than fine perfume, and the day of death better than the day of birth.

Wasting Away but Being Renewed

2 Corinthians 4:16  Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day.
Our latest Christmas vacation made the verse above more real to my heart.  Both my parents are diagnosed to have Alzheimer's, although my Dad’s condition seems to have plateaued.  We would have the same conversation though every 2 or 3 minutes, asking me the same questions over and over again.  I squeeze in a little spiritual insights now and then, but most of his questions are about me, my wife and the kids.
My Mom’s condition is different.  Her vocabulary is depleting, and she cannot finish a sentence because she cannot remember the words she wants to use.  All throughout my stay she seemed to know who I was, but on the day we left she turned to me and asked “are you my son, or my brother?”.  Most of the time she would call me “Toto”, which is both the name of her brother, and a common name in the Ilonggo dialect.  She passed around a notebook to my kids, asking them to write down their names so that she would not forget who they were.

It was hard to see them this way.  It was equally hard for my two older kids who grew up with good memories of their grandparents.  It was sad to know that we would not be seeing them as they used to be.

Life changes.  Our bodies change.  In fact, they’re deteriorating.  And no matter how many herbal or natural vitamins we may drink, or place in our skin, the inevitable is happening – we are wasting away.

Of course I didn’t have to visit my parents to realize this truth.  Every new ache and pain that I feel in my body moves me to pray that it is just something minor.  Of course every time I get a good blood pressure reading, or a positive blood test result, it moves me to thank the Lord for His faithfulness.  But I know that I’m not as strong, or as healthy, as I used to be.  And they remind me of the truth of 2 Corinthians 4:16 - Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day.

It was a chance for me to have a family talk with my wife and kids about what is happening with my parents.  What we are seeing is what happens to each one of us.  Even though I pray that I may not go the same way they are experiencing now, or have a grave disease or attack in the future, yet one thing is for sure – our bodies are wasting away.  And so, what should we be concerned about, more than our bodies?  Our inner lives. 

We do not live forever. Our bodies wasting away remind us that we are not going to be keeping our bodies, or living in this earth, forever. So what gives us hope? Our inward lives. “Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day.
2 Corinthians 4:18  So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.

How is our eternity set?  Through our believing in what Christ Jesus did on the cross for us.  Many Christians look at Jesus on the cross and wonder what He was doing there  Why did He have to suffer?  He did it for us...in our stead.  The pain, and punishment, He bore on the cross was payment for something that we sinners owed Him.  To believe in Christ as our Savior, as the One who paid for our sins, sets our eternity with Him.
John 3:16  "For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.
John 3:17  For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him.
John 3:18  Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe stands condemned already because he has not believed in the name of God's one and only Son.

What about our “new year’s resolution”?  What did we pray to the Lord for this new year?  Was it about something external, something we want to “see” or gain materially, physically or externally?  All of us, including myself, have that tendency to fix our eyes on what is seen, on what is temporary, for it gives us some sense of joy, fulfillment and happiness…temporarily.  What our minds and bodies do not tell us is that we are wasting away, and we need to focus on things that are unseen, what we will enjoy eternally – our hearts.

Should we not be praying for a stronger faith, a deeper relationship and walk with our God?  Should we not be “wishing” that we live a life of trust, dependence on the Lord, and see Him in every blessing and trial that we face?  Should we not be praying that we be more Christ-like, more like our Lord, in all our dealings with man?  Should we not be making this our priority, what we fix our eyes on?

Not just for the new year, but for every day of our life!  What is seen is temporary…what is unseen is eternal.
Proverbs 4:23  Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.

Driving Around

It was a Sunday night and our helpers were on their day off, so my family and I decided to eat out.  Our first choice was a place that served good spareribs at a very affordable price.  My wife and I were invited to eat there once, but the kids had not yet tried it, and so they were excited to give it a try.  But when we reached the area we could not find it.  So we decided to go to another place commonly known as “fake Bob’s”.  It was called that because the owner was a former cook of a well known restaurant here called “Bob’s”, and he served food that tasted a lot like his former employer, but at a more affordable price. Our kids had heard about that place and were excited to try it, but when we arrived it was closed.

“Where to next?” the kids asked.  So we all decided to have good old Chicken Inasal, the local favorite here in Bacolod.  So we drove off to a well known server of Inasal, a place called Aida’s, that had recently opened a new branch in a place near our house – so we thought.  When we arrived another restaurant was occupying the place!  Ok, so our next choice was “Mang Inasal”, a well known eatery that served “unlimited rice”.  We like eating in this place because we leave “busog”, filled, after eating a big piece of chicken leg or thigh, with as much rice as we want.  It’s the restaurant you go to when you feel like breaking your diet and gaining a little more weight.  Well, this time, upon arriving in the “mini mall” where it was, we couldn’t find a parking space.

When we finally found a parking space it was right in front of another Chicken Inasal restaurant called “Chicken Deli”, also well known, and that also served unlimited rice (they call it Kan-on all you can).  It’s as if a light switched on, and the a parking space was reserved for us!  And I said “hey, why not here?”.  And why not, because the chicken they serve is as good as any other Chicken Inasal place here.  So, we ordered, ate and went home full and satisfied.  After all the driving around, and all the seemingly “closed doors” we encountered, we finally ended up in a restaurant that was never in our minds at that time, but that ended up satisfying our appetites and filling our stomachs.  It’s as if God was leading our way to where He wanted us to eat.

Proverbs 19:21  Many are the plans in a man's heart, but it is the Lord's purpose that prevails.

Life can be so much like what my family and I went through.  We make our plans, “drive around” trying to fulfill them.  Many times we can’t seem to find the way, or we end up in a dead end, or with circumstances closing the doors to them.  Hindrances and missed opportunities frustrate us, sometimes causing us to panic.

But if our lives are in the hands of a Sovereign God, who not only controls our life, but has actually written down its events already in advanced, we know that every closed door, every hindrance that we experience, are just part of the highway He has prepared that will eventually lead us to His plan for us.  And even if His plan was not exactly like what we originally had in mind, yet in it we are satisfied, filled, because it is one that was planned by our loving and faithful God.  It is where He wants us to be.

Psalm 139:16  … All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.

It’s nice to know that even if things do not go exactly the way we planned, or wanted them to be, we will eventually end up where our Lord wants us to be, where He will satisfy and fill us – as long, of course, as we remain fully trusting and dependent on our Sovereign and Loving God.

Good Memories

I was talking with a sister in Christ who had just come from the US and she was sharing with me the places that she visited.  She was talking about New York, and the statue of Liberty, the Empire State Building, places that I had been to also way back 1978.  We were comparing notes, how it felt to be on top of what used to be the tallest building in the world (when I was there), and how it felt like it was moving, and how strong the wind was, and how small the cars in the street looked from the top.  The feeling she had brought back the awesome feeling I had when I visited the place.  Our talk brought back good memories of my visit way back when.

A few weeks before we also had a chat on facebook when she was in San Francisco, and she was sharing how beautiful it was – the weather, the streets, the cable car ride.  As we were chatting I could not help but remember the good times I had there with my cousins, riding the cable car, going down Lombard road, eating in fisherman’s wharf.  And when I was there ‘78 that was when Saturday Night Fever was showing, and I was able to watch it there.  Of course that lead to me and my cousins going to a disco, and “staying alive”!  I remember telling my friend that I literally “left my heart in San Francisco”. 

It’s great how we remember these milestones in life.  Our minds keep them stored for us to remember, to bring back to life.  And when we bring them back and talk about them again it brings joy, a smile to our face.

Of course we do have some bad memories, and they do haunt us once in a while.  But we overshadow them with the great memories, and remember that, though we did have some bad experiences in the past, yet they are balanced by the good.

How important it is for us to remember.  Even with regards to our spiritual life, our walk with God.  Many times our bad experiences, whether in the past or present, will fill our minds with worry and anxiety.  David had an experience like that, and he shares it in this psalm:

Psalm 77:1-9  I cried out to God for help; I cried out to God to hear me. 2  When I was in distress, I sought the Lord; at night I stretched out untiring hands and my soul refused to be comforted. 3  I remembered you, O God, and I groaned; I mused, and my spirit grew faint. 4  You kept my eyes from closing; I was too troubled to speak. 5  I thought about the former days, the years of long ago; 6  I remembered my songs in the night. My heart mused and my spirit inquired: 7  "Will the Lord reject forever? Will he never show his favor again? 8  Has his unfailing love vanished forever? Has his promise failed for all time? 9  Has God forgotten to be merciful? Has he in anger withheld his compassion?"

Sound familiar?  Yup, I’m sure it does.  We all have these moments when we think God isn’t listening, or isn’t moving in our life, when we feel He has left us on our own to fight the battle.  But after struggling with his feelings, look what David did:

Psalm 77:10-14  Then I thought, "To this I will appeal: the years of the right hand of the Most High." 11  I will remember the deeds of the LORD; yes, I will remember your miracles of long ago. 12  I will meditate on all your works and consider all your mighty deeds. 13  Your ways, O God, are holy. What god is so great as our God? 14  You are the God who performs miracles; you display your power among the peoples.

David appealed to the “years of the right hand of the Most High”.  He remembered how God had been faithful to Israel and to him.  He brought back to mind, and heart, how the Lord worked miracles for them, how great He was, and how He displayed His power among the peoples.  And this was what brought back hope.

How important it is to keep track, to keep in heart, to have great memories of God’s working in our life.  This is, of course, dependent on whether or not we have acknowledged God’s working in every experience we have had, whether good or bad.  Someone who has been trusting in himself, or in other people, will not be able to see the “years of the right hand of the Most High”.  But for those of us who have prayed, have entrusted our every experience, who have acknowledged God’s hand in every area of our life, should be able to look back and see how faithful He has been to us, how He has seen us through.  And this should give us hope.

Memories of our personal experiences remind us of what has past.  Memories of God remind us that He is here and now.  God has not changed.  Who He was in our past, is who He is today, and who He will be in our future.  Let’s keep these memories of God’s faithfulness fresh in our minds day by day.  May this give us hope.

Hebrews 13:8  Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.

Malachi 3:6  "I the LORD do not change.

Easy, Fast and Convenient

I'm sitting on a sofa, writing this blog using the blogger app I downloaded for my iPod. And I'm thinking - wow, now I can write anywhere and anytime I want, as long as I have my iPod with me. And this iPod...another cool thing. It's not just a music player anymore! Now I can do almost anything with it - check my appointments, surf the web, go to facebook, read my bible, check the news, and listen to music if I want!

Technology has really made things easier, faster and more convenient. And it's great! Believe me, for someone who began watching black and white tv, I've seen how technology has changed things, and I'm enjoying it.

Sadly it's made some people forget how easy, fast and convenient it also is to communicate, talk and interact with the Lord. We don't need an Internet connection or a wifi signal to call Him or commune with Him. From the moment God created man He has always made ways to communicate with him, and to Make sure that we have access to Him. Take prayer, for example:
'Call to Me and I will answer you, and I will tell you great and mighty things, which you do not know.' (Jeremiah 33:3 NASB)
Of course this was always with the premise that we were calling Him with all our heart, and not just taking a chance, just in case anyone is "up there".
When you think of it, prayer is as fast as closing your eyes and opening your heart, and God is there.  How we make the mistake of opening our smartphones, laptops or computers first and fixing our eyes on these things before we spend time in prayer and fellowship with God.

How fast does it take for God to hear our prayer?
As soon as you began to pray, an answer was given, which I have come to tell you... (Daniel 9:23 NIV84)
Actually it's even faster than that...
Psalm 139:4  Before a word is on my tongue you know it completely, O LORD.
God knows us more than we realize.

Technology has distracted us, making us think that it is faster, easier to depend on it. But our God has not changed. He is still there, waiting for us to call upon Him, and He will answer.

Go ahead, enjoy technology and it's benefits.  But I do hope we take advantage of this easy, fast and convenient opportunity to fellowship and enjoy God in our life, and make it our priority day by day!